Mine did! And I want that to change immediately.  I was reading an article recently about a woman who battled her weight since childhood and has finally come to accept her body as it is today.  A goal we’d all like to share.  She calls it “figure fondness.”  I’ll provide a link to the article at the end of this blog.

One point she points out in the article is how she kept her personality small to compensate for her body size.


She always worked to be small — keeping her personality and stature as small as possible.You don't have be in love with body

“I was fighting against my nature because being big wasn’t good.”

After achieving her weight-loss goal, Pibworth decided to move forward, trying to find pride in her personality again.

I was completely and utterly blown away after reading this.  I’ve been doing this FOR YEARS, and never, ever realized I was unconsciously keeping myself small — allowing others to shine in the spotlight while I hide in the background.

Finding pride in her personality again.  This is awesome!

If you know me personally, you’re probably thinking that it’s not true that I keep myself small…oh believe me I do.  I may be engaging and God knows I’ll talk your ear off, but it’s not without self-judgment, walls of protection, safety, and exposing myself on MY terms.

Do you keep yourself small too? 

Are you uncomfortable with people you don’t know?  Always concerned that you’re being judged because of your size?  Staying small as not to be seen? 

Do you assume everyone is smarter, more successful, better prepared than you especially if they are thinner?  And if they are skinny, OMG they are brilliant and live the most perfect life. 

People fussing over you or calling attention to you makes your feel uncomfortable? 

Fear of success or “being too big for your britches” is active in your thoughts. 

Does your size keep your hidden in the background, while everyone else gets the attention? 

Do you let others get the recognition because of your size? 

Do you hand over your power to people who are thinner than you?


Maybe not all of these apply to you, but what can we do with these thoughts and/or feelings should this arise?

How do you make a splash in the world f?  How do you stop allowing your size to determine your worth?


Here are a few strategies I’ve learned through the psychology of eating.


  • Taking ownership – monitoring how you show up in public and listening to how you speak to yourself internally.  How are you sitting/standing?   Are your shoulders hunched over?  How are you dressing?  Are you hiding behind your baggy clothes?
  • STOP apologizing for your size!  There is no need to automatically explain to everyone that you are on a “diet” so people know you are trying to rid yourself of this self-proclaimed ugly weight.
  • Agreeing to the journey – You deserve to be here just as much as anyone else.  You work just as hard as everyone else at doing our best. Take a stance on your purpose and deliver your gifts to the world.
  • Your weight does not define YOU!!!!!!
  • Give yourself permission to work on having the kind of body that makes you feel good without strict, restrictive dieting – finding your natural way of eating that is healthy for our body. 
  • Reclaim our dignity and stand up for yourself – even though you weigh a certain weight, you still can do the best for yourself.
  • Claim warrior – stand in your power
  • Speak and live in your truth
  • How you value yourself is how other will value you too!  When you keep your personality small, people will treat you small.  When you see yourself as weak and not worthy of the time of day then others will treat you as weak because that’s the absolute message you are energetically projecting.
  • When you continually keep yourself small and hidden in the background, you miss out on the stuff you enjoy.
  • Love yourself at your current weight and peacefully value your own self-worth with the self-care you deserve.
  • Learn to be free from the opinions of others – what people think of you is none of your business
  • Stop trying to please everyone and begin to please yourself.


It’s about catching yourself when you drop into hiding and bringing your focus back to self-love, acceptance, powerful warrior.

Every day, do the hokey pokey and put your whole self in!

The greatest takeaway I want you to have is instead of trying to change yourself to please others, maybe the people who are judging you need to work on how they see others and start to work on their own issues.  What do you think of them apples?

Does any of this resonate with you?  If I can help move you to a place of peace and self-love, click here to begin the conversation.

I would love to help you be seen for your greatest self and escort you to your purposeful life without the burden of negative thoughts and undervaluing who you really are.  Call me at 718-258-9198 to set up a FREE consultation.

Oh, here’s the link to the article I mentioned at the beginning of the blog.  http://bit.ly/1tobIrz

Always remember it’s about time we return to the heart.



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